I believe there is an epidemic spreading like wildfire these days and I hold social media accountable for this problem (yes, another one of those I’m sorry). Why has it become so easy to side with the hustle and bustle of busy rather than to find time to intentionally invest in what makes our hearts grow? Here’s the deal, we use a crazy amount of our time taking the quick way out on growing relationship by checking on our friend’s latest story or status on facebook. Don’t get me wrong I am unbelievably grateful for the resource to connect with people and keep up with them ESPECIALLY when distance is a factor (I’ve made insta friends which has been the neatest thing), BUT I am just as guilty as anyone in feeling like that the scroll check up is good enough.
I tend to do this often, but I am learning as I navigate through all of my adulthood shenanigans that time is valuable and how we choose to spend it is powerful. Now this post is not a matter of disregarding that life is busy (like the fact this post has been sitting as a draft for forever and I’ve had every intention of posting this AT LEAST A MONTH ago). We have jobs, we have families, we have responsibilities. I understand all of that, but in the middle of taking care of the necessities of life do we ever stop to think if our souls are on empty? Have you talked to your husband about something other than “who’s picking up the kids, what time is that appointment again or did you remember to take the trash out?!” Are you finding yourself on edge with your little one because you haven’t had a second to yourself and they insist that they sit in the bathroom with you? When is the last time you took yourself up on “let’s have a girl’s weekend” or told your extended family to spend some uninterrupted/not shared time and actually put plans in place for this to happen? I have been (and still at times am) the worst at honestly only desiring for quality time with people and not following through on making those desires come into fruition (if I’ve told you I want to get together and sincerely mean it so feel free to call me out if I’ve forgotten), but for the first time in five years my best friend’s and I FINALLY had our girl’s weekend.
Yes, that says five years and yes we have seen each other over that span of time through wedding/baby showers, weddings, random weekends and holidays but those times were more out of a to-do attend, quick happenstance or shared with multiple people where time is split, shared and sometimes accidentally for lack of a better term, hi-jacked. You see Dylan has been in my life since Pre-K and Kate joined the club in 5th grade; these are my people and we have been best friends for basically my entire life. We went through the awkward JH days, volleyball, basketball, track all the way through high school and of course we suffered/managed/survived all the boy stuff together. We each have our own crazy shares of HS love stories, but we made it out on the other side where we all were in each other’s weddings post college; PLUS McKinlee even debuted in both weddings, Kate’s still in the womb and Dylan’s as flower girl with her nephew Kutter, which was one of those “I think we’re really old now” realization moments. There a number of life events that have taken place which has made the time for sleepovers pretty much nonexistent, SO we made sure back in April we would commit, plan and follow through on spending a weekend together. Now if you’d stayed with me thus far you may be thinking why are you telling me this?!
Because you need to plan the weekend even it’s five months in advance. Too often we are quicker to fall back on reasons not to get together, because we’re just “so busy” rather than committing to finding the weekend you can. The three of us did this for the longest time, but finally said WE ARE GOING TO DO THIS Lord willing. We dreamed, shared a note via iPhone (which if you don’t know how to do this you need to) and texted about all the things we wanted to do and we did them. Plan the weekend. Eat too much food, stay up too late and do absolutely ridiculous animal face masks. Fill your tank up and invest. When’s the last time you called your grandparents? I know there are a number of people who would give anything to hear their Grandpa’s voice on the other end of the phone or sit down across the table and feast on some friend chicken to pass around the table. I’d like to talk NBA basketball with my Lolo and laugh along with my Lola at the thanksgiving table with my Mama and Tita Lanie. Time is precious and time with my trio and my extended family in September was made of deep, meaningful memories while I showed all of them around the place we now call home. If you can pick up the phone or better yet go see your family. Plan the weekend y’all, because I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again life is way too short to not invest in your friendships and family even when you feel like you’re a million miles away and life seems just so busy. So what. Your people will drive to you and your heart will delight in their presence.